Do your sins, come back, and I’ll bless you

Do your sins, come back, and I’ll bless you

There were three nuns, they all told the priest that they were going to do one sin each.

So the priest says ok, do your sins, come back, and I’ll bless you.

So, they went to do their sins and came back to get blessed.

The priest asked the first one who was laughing what her sin was. She said, “I h@d s*x with a guy.”

The priest said ok, blessed her and said go drink some holy water.

So she did! The next one was laughing harder, and the priest asked her what her sin was.

She said, “I got in a fight with another nun.” So he says ok, blessed her and told her to go drink some holy water. So she did.

The priest asked the last one who was laughing even harder what she did.

And as she was laughing she said, “I pissed in the holy water!”

She Loved the Dinner… But the Kitchen Introductions Were Even Better!

One cold, rainy evening, a nun lost her way while traveling through the countryside.

Soaking wet and exhausted, she arrived at a nearby monastery and politely asked if she could spend the night.

The monks warmly welcomed her inside.

“You’re just in time for dinner, Sister.”

What followed was one of the best meals she’d ever had.

Golden, crispy fish…

Perfectly cooked chips…

Every bite was heavenly.

After dinner, she made her way to the kitchen to thank the cooks personally.

Inside, she found two smiling monks.

One stepped forward.

“Good evening! I’m Brother Michael…”

He pointed to the other monk.

“…and this is Brother Charles.”

The nun smiled warmly.

“Thank you both. That was the finest fish and chips I’ve ever tasted!”

Then, curious, she asked,

“Tell me… who cooked what?”

Brother Charles grinned.

“I cooked the fish.”

“Around here, they call me…”

“…the Fish Friar.”

The nun laughed and turned to the other monk.

“Well then… you must be…”

Brother Michael smiled proudly.

“…the Chip Monk.”

The Department Store Incident
Two young nuns were shopping for convent supplies at a large department store downtown. While they were riding the escalator to the upper floor, the power grid of the entire building suddenly failed. The lights went out instantly, and the escalator came to an abrupt halt.
People around them began to panic and cry for help. The two nuns stood silently in the middle of the escalator, closed their eyes, and began to whisper prayers devoutly.
After exactly two hours of isolation, the backup power system was activated, the lights turned back on, and the escalator started moving again. The two nuns stepped off, breathing a sigh of relief.
A security guard ran over to check on them: “Are you sisters okay? I am so sorry for the incident that kept you trapped on the escalator for a full two hours!”
The leading nun smiled kindly and replied, “We are fine, thank you. But it was truly a terrifying experience. We had to stand perfectly still and pray for two hours, fearing that the escalator would fall down.”
The security guard scratched his head, looking at the two nuns in total confusion: “But Sisters… you only needed to walk up five more steps to reach the next floor?”

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