The Low-Battery Distress Call
A young woman frantically called her gynecologist’s office, begging for an immediate emergency appointment. Sensing the panic in her voice, the receptionist told her to come straight in.
She rushed to the clinic, bypassed the waiting room, and was ushered directly into an examination room. When the doctor arrived, she was too overcome with embarrassment to explain the situation, simply blushing furiously and pleading, “Please, Doctor, just examine me. It’s an emergency.”
The doctor nodded sympathetically and got to work. After a thorough and careful examination, he popped his head up, looking quite grave.
“I’m so sorry, Miss,” the doctor sighed, wiping his brow. “But removing that stuck vibrator is going to involve a very lengthy, delicate, and incredibly expensive surgical operation.”
The young woman slumped back on the table, defeated. “Oh gosh… I’m not sure I can afford all that,” she mumbled.
She paused for a second, looked at the doctor, and asked, “How much would it cost to just replace the batteries?”
A woman hears a knock at the door.
When she opens it, a man asks, “Do you have a spare room?”
She slams the door in disgust.
The next morning, the same man shows up. Again, he asks,
“Do you have a spare room?”
She slams the door once more.
That night, when her husband gets home, she tells him what’s been happening.
The husband says, “Honey, tomorrow I’ll stay home. If he shows up again, I’ll hide behind the door. Answer ‘yes’—I want to hear where this joker is going with it.”
The next morning, the man knocks again.
“Do you have a spare room?”
The wife replies, “Yes, actually, I do.”
The man grins and says,
“Great! Then tell your husband to stay in yours and stop sneaking into mine!”
After Four Years, She Was Ready to Date Again
A woman lost her husband almost four years ago. Her daughter kept encouraging her to start dating again.
Finally, she agreed but admitted she didn’t know anyone. Her daughter immediately said, **”Mom, I want to introduce you to someone.”**
It was an instant connection. The woman and the man hit it off right away, and after six weeks of dating, he invited her to spend a weekend with him in Spain.
On their first night there, they both undr*ssed. She st00d n@ked except for a pair of black p@nties, while he st00d in his birthday s*it. After looking her over, he curiously asked, **”Why black p@nties?”**
She smiled and said, **”My b0dy is yours to expl0re, but d0wn there… I’m still grieving.”**
He sighed, realizing luck wasn’t on his side that night.
The next evening was the same. She st00d before him in black p@nties, but this time, he was also we@ring something—a black c0ver over his m@nh00d.
She raised an eyebrow and asked, **”What’s with the black?”**
With a smirk, he replied, **”I want to express my deepest condolences.”**
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