An 80th Birthday Misunderstanding
It was a man’s 80th birthday, and his friends wanted to get him a special gift.
Since he was a widower of many years, and after some discussion, they decided to have a girl come to his house that night and give him the time of his life.
Later that evening, as the old man was getting ready for bed, he heard the doorbell ring.
He opens the door and sees a girl standing there in a sexy outfit.
She says to the senior: “Hi there, I’m here to give you some SUPER LOVIN’!”
The old man thinks for a moment… then says: “I’ll take the soup.”
A homeless guy is travelling down a country lane,
A homeless guy is travelling down a country lane, tired and hungry he comes across a pub called the ‘George and the Dragon’.
Although it’s late and the pub is closed, he knocks on the door. The innkeeper’s wife sticks her head out a window.
“Could I have some food?”, he asks.
The woman glances at his shabby clothes and obviously poor condition and sternly says, “No!”
“Any chance of a pint of ale then?”
“No!”, she says again.
“Could I at least sleep in your barn?”
“No!” By this time, she was clearly getting very annoyed.
The down and out says, “Okay then might I please…?”
“What now?”, the woman interrupts impatiently.
“… might I please have a word with George?
Mother superior tells two new nuns
Mother superior tells two new nuns that they have to paint their room without getting any paint on their clothes.
One nun suggests to the other, “Hey, let’s t* ke all our cl*thes off, fold them up, and lock the door.”
So they do this, and begin painting their room.
Soon they hear a knock at the door. They ask, “Who is it?”
“Bl*nd man!” The nuns look at each other and one nun says, “He’s bl*nd, so he can’t see. It won’t matter” They let him in.
The bl*nd man walks in and says, “Wow!! Very nice. Where do you want me to hang the blinds?
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Check the joke below:
After being married for thirty years, a wife asked her husband to describe her.
He looked at her for a while, then said, “You’re A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K.”
She asks… “What does that mean?”
He said, “Adorable, Beautiful, Cute, Delightful, Elegant, Foxy, Gorgeous, Hot.”
She smiled happily and said… “Oh, that’s so lovely… What about I, J, K?”
He said, “I’m Just Kidding!”
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