On his de@thbed, Henry asked his wife, “Martha, in our 50 years of marriage, have you ever been unfaithful to me?”
Martha sighed, “I have to be honest, Henry. Yes, three times—but always for a good reason.”
Henry was hurt but curious. “What reasons?”
“The first time,” Martha explained, “was when we were about to lose our house. Remember when I visited the banker, and the next day he extended our loan?”
Henry nodded. “I forgive you. You saved our home. What about the second time?”
“Remember when you needed that expensive heart surgery we couldn’t afford? I went to see your doctor, and he did the operation for free.”
“Wow,” Henry wept. “You did that to save my life. I forgive you. But what about the third time?”
Martha replied, “Do you remember when you ran for golf club president, and you were short by 73 votes?”
One day a state trooper while patrolling the roads spied a vehicle on a country road at twenty-two miles an hour. It looked quite suspicious to him so he pulled the driver over. When the state trooper was approaching the car, he noticed that the passengers inside looked wide-eyed and really pale.
As he stood next to the car the elderly driver started talking, “Officer, I don’t understand why you pulled me over, I was going exactly the speed limit! So I don’t understand what seems to be the problem?”
“Sir”, the officer replied, “indeed you weren’t speeding, but driving much slower than the speed limit can also be very dangerous.” “I’m sorry officer but I beg to differ, I was doing exactly the speed limit as stated on the sign: twenty-two miles an hour!” the old man said.
The trooper was a bit surprised but started explaining that the “22” on the sign was the route number and not the speed limit. A bit embarrassed, the old man grinned a bit and thanked the state trooper for pointing out his mistake.
