The Ranger Thought It Was an Open-and-Shut Case
A wife takes her husband, an avid amateur fisherman, out onto the lake to drift and read. She rows for a while, drops anchor, and then resumes her reading. Soon after, the park ranger appears in his motorboat.
“Good day, madam, what are you doing here?”
“I’m reading,” the woman replied.
The park ranger replied: “But you are in a zone where fishing is prohibited.”
“But I’m not fishing at all, you can see that,” the woman replied.
The parking attendant: “Well, you have all the necessary equipment with you. I’ll have to take you in and issue you a ticket.”
“If you do that, I will report you for r@pe,” the enraged woman replied.
“But I didn’t even touch you…?!”
The woman snaps back:
“Well, you’ve brought all the equipment with you!”
Two longtime friends were catching up over drinks when one finally asked, “So… how did you meet your husband?”
Her friend smiled and took a sip before answering.
“I was working at a pharmacy.”
“One day, this really confident guy walked in and asked for XXXL condoms.”
“I thought, ‘Now that’s a bold introduction.’”
“We started chatting, one conversation led to another, we fell in love… and eventually got married.”
Her friend laughed. “That’s actually a pretty romantic story!”
“Oh, it gets better,” she replied with a grin.
“After the wedding, I discovered something I never saw coming.”
“What was it?”
“He didn’t need XXXL condoms at all…”
“He just had a terrible stutter!”
