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On reaching his plane seat,
A man is surprised to see a parrot seated next to him.
He asks the stewardess for a coffee, then the parrot squawks
“And get me a whisky, you cow!”
The stewardess, flustered, brings back a whisky for the parrot but forgets the man’s coffee.
When the man points it out to her, the parrot drains its glass and bawls
“And get me another whisky, you id!to.”
Upset, the stewardess comes back with another whisky – but still no coffee.
By now in desperate need for his coffee, the man tries the parrot’s style,
“I’ve asked you twice for a coffee, go get it now, you m0ron.”
Before they know it, two burly flight stewards storm down the aisle, grab the parrot and the man, yank them out of their seats, and throw them out of the emergency exit.
Plunging downwards the parrot turns to the man and says
“For someone who can’t fly, you sure complain too much!”
The Beach Discovery They Weren’t Ready For 😂
There was a little old man who was in very good shape but noticed one morning that he was suntanned over his entire body with the exception of his p*nis…
So he went to the beach, completely *ndr*ssed and buried himself in the sand except for his p*nis.
Just then, two old ladies were strolling along the sand one walking with a cane. Upon seeing this thing sticking out of the sand she began to move it about with her cane, remarking to the other little old lady, “there ain’t hardly no justice in this world.“ The other little old lady asked“what do you mean by that?“
Well, she said:
When I was 20, I was curious about it.
When I was 30, I enjoyed it.
When I was 40 I asked for it.
When I was 50, I paid for it.
When I was 60, I prayed for it.
When I was 70, I forgot about it.
And now that I’m 80, the d*mn things are growing wild, and I’m too old to squat.
