One day, the wife comes home with a spectacular diamond ring. “Where did you get that ring?” her husband asks.
“Well, she replies, “My boss and I played the lottery and we won, so I bought it with my share of the winnings.”
A week later, his wife comes home with a long shiny fur coat. Where did you get that coat?” her husband asks. She replies “My boss and I played the lottery and we won again, so I bought it with my share of the winnings.”
Another week later, his wife comes home, driving a flaming red Ferrari……. You guessed it: Her share of the lottery winnings….
That night, the wife asks her husband to run her a nice warm bath while She gets undressed. When she enters the bathroom, she finds that there is barely enough water in the bath to cover the bath plug. “What the f*ck is this?” she asks her husband.
“Well,” he replies, “We don’t want to get your frickin’ lottery ticket wet, do we??”
At the end of their first date, a young man takes his date home.
Emboldened by the night, he decides to try for that important first kiss.
With an air of confidence, he leans with his hand against the wall and, smiling, he says to her, “Darling, how ’bout a goodnight kiss?”
Horrified, she replies, “Are you mad? My parents will see us!”
“Oh come on! Who’s gonna see us at this hour?”
“No, please. Can you imagine if we get caught?”
“Oh come on, there’s nobody around, they’re all sleeping!”
“No way. It’s just too risky!”
“Oh please, please, I like you so much!!”
“No, no, and no. I like you too, but I just can’t!”
“Pleeeeease?…”
